Monday, June 10, 2013

Vacation and Feeling Safe


This is an interesting combination. I pulled these recently (maybe a few days ago), and they pertain to a short vacation we'll be taking next week and possibly the week after that, depending on what we can schedule.  What they brought to mind is how tense/nervous I get while traveling at times. First of all, I'm not always sure how my daughter will do. With some lingering sensory issues and some ADHD as well as mood issues, it can be unpleasant at times (and sometimes just downright impossible) to travel.

Then, on top of that, I have my own sensory issues and anxieties. I belong to a family (who I adore, mind you) who loves to share food and drink and the like--and I have a bit of a germ phobia (well, at least where sharing body fluids like saliva and blood are concerned). I just don't share their enthusiasm for that. I feel like my personal boundaries need to be stronger, and it just makes me nervous. Anyway, it's not something I usually talk about on here.

So, all of this, including financial concerns, makes me nervous to travel, but at the same time I really want to break outside of my usual routine and also see people who I don't get to see very often. Part of how I mitigate this stress of visiting family or friends is by booking a hotel for the night or two that I'm visiting, so that we have separate space to retreat to if we're overwhelmed--if my daughter is a bit fussy or overstimulated, or also if I am. I just prefer having my own space, even if it costs extra money. Ever since I was a kid I remember a feeling of just wanting to get away from the hubbub, the noise and chaos. I'm just very sensitive to sensory stimuli.

I think everyone experiences some degree of stress when traveling, or visiting, and it just depends on their particular issues or relationship with their family. I recognize the need to make plans in order for us to feel safe as well as less stressed. That's what I saw in these cards.

Love,
MM

2 comments:

  1. Once again, you speak my language. I understand these feelings. I like family occasions, but I don't like them to go on for too long and eventually want to retreat back to my hole. I also know what you mean about the germ stuff. I am not so bad now (I kid myself) but I used to be terrible when I was a teen - not wanting to eat in restaurants or drink from cups at people's houses because I'd believe that they had not been cleaned properly. I'd proper freak out inside. I still don't like going away and sharing bathrooms really. I like the comfort of my own bathroom, know what I mean?

    I see those wings in the second card as being wooden. She stands away from the building and the words that came to mind were 'home from home', so maybe a space like a hotel would be a good option and way of balance.

    Hope you have a good time!

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  2. Thank you for commiserating! It makes me feel better knowing I am not the only one who deals with these feelings. Often, I just feel guilty for not 'sharing' but to me it causes so much stress that it just doesn't seem worth it. I just feel so much better having personal boundaries.

    Lots of hugs and I do hope you are having a good Monday.

    Hugs,
    MM

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