Thursday, July 25, 2013

Unexpected Life Purpose Message


I purchased the Life Purpose Oracle Cards a while back--maybe a month ago? I can't remember exactly when it was I but I think it was June. Anyway. Not important so much.

This deck is interesting, but it is very specific and so I don't recommend you use it unless you are answering a question specifically about a purpose. It would be frustrating and annoying. Hehee.

Here is today's trio: Time to Decide, Children and Family

I admit this isn't quite what I was expecting, but maybe it makes more sense than I realize now.

The first card pulled was Time to Decide. That made sense on some level, too. If I'm going to pursue something I need to know what I am pursuing. So I pulled two cards representing a direction to pursue and I got 'Children' and 'Family'. But the weird thing is, I am trying to focus AWAY from these things. I've spent nearly 8 years as a stay-at-home mom (which I know pales in comparison to my mother who spent 30+), and my daughter is going off to school this fall and I'm nervous as hell, but anyway.

I feel like something needs to shift in terms of focus. I need to have heartfelt goals that will keep me interested in life. But...I don't want these goals to be hollow or determined by the wrong things. I want it to really mean something. And it needs to be on a budget because...well, I have no money.

And when it comes to working with children...it doesn't appeal to me. I hate to be rude, but I am not the person who enjoys teaching children or working in a day care or whatever else can involve groups of children. I found it hard and not particularly fun. I always express awe at people who work with groups of children. Children are like wild little forces of nature! I think that's how I knew I would never have more than one or two kids. I am better one on one or maybe a small group of adults.

The aspect of this reading that makes sense to me is about loving friends and family. I do feel that one of the most important thing about life is being able to love and uplift others when possible. This is something I am always trying to practice, but it's something that really takes a lifetime to work on and to do. Or perhaps what this trio is saying is that I will never have a normal 'job' and that nurturing others as a mother, friend or whatnot is my job? I don't even know.

SOO...what in the world do I do with this message? I am not sure yet. I will try to be open-minded about it, though.

Love,
MM

19 comments:

  1. Homeschooling? I know it's come up before but I can't remember exactly what your thoughts were about it.

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    1. p.s. I REALLY, REALLY wanted to like homeschooling. I really did. And to be honest part of me doesn't want to leave the familiarity of it, but it just doesn't seem right for me. I see people who it seems very right for, and they do a great job with it. I decided not to fight the fact that I don't really vibe with it!

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  2. Hi Siddaleah!

    Actually I was homeschooling this year. Trying, anyway. I was terrible at it! I didn't like that either. That's part of why she's going to a Waldorf-style charter school this fall despite my nervousness. I've avoided schools because I do find them to be problematic in a lot of ways--but this new school that's opening up is really cool in a lot of ways. The Waldorf model is much more play-based, more creative. But I think what I realized is that being a full-time homeschooler is not my gig. I tried and it hasn't been too good for my daughter or myself.

    I have seen several moms homeschool that do a wonderful job at it. I guess I am just not one of them--I have found it difficult at best!!!

    I think if I had more than one child it might help? I have one child and I feel that homeschooling her is too isolating. And I don't feel I fit into most homeschooling groups because I am not a Christian and I feel uncomfortable putting her in that environment. I mean...no offense against Christians, as most of my friends are Christian, but it just didn't seem right.

    So this option seemed the best to me...although I still have a lot of respect for home schoolers.

    Hugs,
    MM

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  3. Have you read anything about unschooling? I know the philosophy doesn't jibe with everyone's idea of what makes for an excellent education, so I'm just throwing it out as a possibility. It's worked beautifully in our family. It does take work, but I find it much more enjoyable than the method of following curriculum or ticking off marks on a progress chart or following grade level recommendations.

    Also, I don't know what your area is like but we have lots of Christian homeschooling support groups and a lot of what is called, "all inclusive homeschooling groups." Maybe you could do a little searching on the internet to see who is meeting up in your area. In the past we've just met once a week for play dates at the park, which helped us form bonds with like minded families. We've done camping trips with our homeschooling friends. Had craft days. Field trips to farms and museums etc...

    It is more challenging with one child, you're right I think. So, meeting up and getting out in the world would be a life and sanity saver.

    Not offering suggestions to pressure you or make you feel bad about whatever choice you make, just throwing it out there in case it sparks an idea for you.

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    1. and in case you do want to read a bit more about unschooling this is a nice article for those new to the idea written by an unschooling dad along with some links for more reading:

      http://zenhabits.net/unschool/

      (I'll stop talking about homeschooling/unschooling now. Unless you you have any questions because I don't want to sound like an evangelist or like I think it's the only way to go.)

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    2. Hi Siddaleah,

      Yep, I have read about unschooling and I was trying to employ some of the techniques. I think it's a really cool philosophy. What I have been doing the past year or so has been along the lines of unschooling. I still think it felt unnatural! It sure didn't feel like I thought it should, even after my research and talking to a few people who do it.

      I think it is just down to it isn't right for me!!

      I think I never would have put her in a public school--as I hate traditional public schools and had a terrible time with them.

      Here's the website of the school she'll be going to:

      http://www.mountainsagecommunityschool.org/

      Thanks for your insights! I definitely appreciate your perspective!

      I have been reading and thinking about this for many years, long before she was school aged. It definitely is important to me. I found that even unschooling was not quite right for me. I think honestly that no situation really feels great to me, but I have to compromise in various areas...

      Hugs,
      MM

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    3. p.s. I totally agree with the part about not ticking off ridiculous requirements by grade level--absolutely what we have been trying to avoid! So I guess in essence I have been doing unschooling, but yeah...I think that the fact that I hate (read: despise) groups and don't like meeting up with them, plus having one child and fearing isolating them...lead me to decide to go to a Waldorf school in the town over from us. Believe me it has been a painful process trying to decide this craziness!!!

      Thanks for your support and comments. :)

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  4. I also think something that was hard for me is while I was trying really hard to make home/unschooling work, my daughter kept saying over and over, 'When you are you going to send me to a REAL school?' While I did not agree with her that home-based schooling isn't real, I really think she (unlike me!!) loves groups and kids.

    She knows she's going to this school in the fall and constantly talks about it. She sounds very excited. If she is happy and doing well that is the important thing! I realize now this is not about me and I am trying very hard not to make it about me...but it's hard sometimes.

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  5. I figured you had probably read about unschooling, and I knew you had given it much thought. You are such a concerned mom, and the fact that you want the very best for your little girl sure comes through in your posts. I just mentioned it because so many people think homeschooling means trying to recreate school at home.

    If she's excited about school and wants to be there it sounds like a good thing.:-) The school looks really interesting and kid friendly. At least you know homeschooling is an option if things change. So many people feel like they have no choice and continue to try to work with a really bad situation. Homeschooling is just the first thing that came to my mind when I saw those cards. I noticed the school website talked about an emphasis on parental involvement. Maybe the cards are hinting at a role you'll be playing at the school. Maybe the meaning is just as simple as reminding you that being a mom and finding joy and purpose within your family is a beautiful thing too.

    Don't be nervous! It will be okay. I have feeling you'll be breathing a sigh of relief once you get comfortable with the new routine.

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    1. You totally have my number. I am so so nervous and terrified. I have very negative feelings connected to my childhood and school and I am trying not to pass them along to my daughter. I agree...I can always go back to homeschooling. Just hope u don't regret

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    2. Oops. Stupid cell phone typing! I meant to say I hope I don't regret all of this! Trying to breathe.

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  6. When I started homeschooling my kids, oh, 16 years ago, I was nervous too. I was afraid I'd regret the decision, but I comforted myself with the knowledge that my kids would know I loved them madly and that is what drove my decision. (I only came to homeschooling because of how my son was being treated by the system, not because I had any issues with school being bad for kids or anything.) Come what may, they'd know I did everything in my power to make sure they were healthy, happy, and whole. I still regret lots of things and second guess myself. I think it's in the job description. You'll know if it's not working out, and you can reevaluate if it comes to that. For now, rest easy in the fact that this was a thoughtful decision. Trust yourself. You really do know best.

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    1. Very true. I appreciate your personal journey and insights! Every family is different--as you said there is nothing you can do but stay abreast of the situation and do the best you can!

      Hugs,
      MM

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  7. Hi MM,

    Given how excited she is, and how you hated homeschooling, I'm glad you're giving the Waldorf school a chance. As for the reading, like you said, all the cards are about life purpose, so the readings don't necessarily make the regular kind of sense. I see it saying you need to decide to follow your heart, then it shows you what you don't like (homeschooling/teaching kids), so that you can hear your heart when it gives you a clear no. Although you have to do what is best for your family, that doesn't necessarily mean that you have to do it all yourself, rather that you can do it by the choices you make. Hope that makes sense to you, I need to go back for a nap!

    Hugs,
    Chloë

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  8. Ugh! Silly phone! I shouldn't use my phone to reply but it is nice laying in bed--I also slept badly and then Pele woke early. It is ok...

    That is an interesting interpretation of the cards. I think it is funny that I have a strongly negative reaction to seemingly positive cards.

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  9. I hope you are napping now Chloe! You sure need it...

    Man I miss my old phone keyboard. Thank you for your cool and unique interpretation!! I do wonder about what would be a positive focus...I hope I am not missing something obvious.

    Hugs to you and peaceful sleep,
    MM

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    1. Thanks, MM, I had my best nap all week this morning, yay!

      As for finding a focus, I think the first card's advice is the best: listen to your heart. I once did a course where they suggested a little exercise. First, you tune into yourself, notice how you're sitting, and how you feel. Then, you think about something you definitely don't like or want. Notice what you feel when you think about it. That's your body telling you "No". Then, try to think of something you love and really want, and notice how that feels. That's a "Yes" :D If you can't find a yes, don't do it!

      Hugs,
      Cxx

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    2. Awesome. I am glad to hear that. Do you have a lot of weird dreams? I don't know if I've ever asked you that.

      Yeah, I agree. I think that the simple suggestion of listening to what we want is suprisingly challenging!! Who ever said it would be this hard?! I thought I would be WAY more focused and driven as an adult. I thought I would have some idea of what I really liked or wanted to do. I guess I do, but maybe part of the problem is not really accepting what I like or don't like. Or not honestly pursuing it.

      I like the exercise you suggested. I should do that and write down the results!

      Gracias y Abrazo,
      MM

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    3. Yeah, I do often have quite weird dreams. But then, I reckon any time we remember dreams they're likely to be weird, as that's kinda the nature of dreams...

      Good luck if you try that exercise out. It can take a while to get the hang of. I still find it easier to feel the no than the yes...

      Un abrazo muy fuerte,
      Chloë

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