Thursday, August 15, 2013

Listening to Self, Letting Go



I was watching this astrological video for this week, and the message really hit home for me. As I'm entering the latter half of August, I'm thinking about my daughter being away from me for the first time starting at the end of this month. I've already written about this and why it is hard for me, though most people here can imagine why it's particularly hard for me, so I won't blather on about it.

I had an interesting synchronicity while I was pulling the cards to post for today's reading. Kaypacha was talking about the concept of letting go just as I pulled the Letting Go card. The same thing happened yesterday, actually. I was pulling cards from another fairy deck, the Faerie Guidance Oracle by Paulina Cassidy. I pulled a single card and as I was looking at it the word discovery was repeated several times, which was the title of the card. Yesterday's Wordless Wednesday was that card, except I cut off the word discovery since it was Wordless Wednesday. Kind of silly, but anyway. :)

The Higher Consciousness card on the left side of Letting Go speaks about listening to your higher self rather than the more piddly, lower, stress-based energies. It talks about heeding your intuition and best advice rather than feeling mired in a lot of crappy, self-sabotaging stuff. The card actually tells me that I am on the right track and whatever I've been doing recently is helping. I think this is an interesting thing, since I actually have been doing journalling with my higher or better self, writing out a sort of dialogue in question and answer form about various topics that have been bothering me or that I simply want some information on.

I think this desire to access our own wisdom, or any wisdom whatsoever, is strong in most people. But usually we go outside of ourselves for this. I do this all the time, too. Instead of going within, Hermit style, I seek external validation and answers. But who really knows us better than we do? Even our partners and long-time friends can't know our inner workings as well as we do. So I am going to continue this process of gently quizzing myself and then awaiting the answers from my higher self, and then trusting them. Even if they turn out to be wrong later, I'll know I took the step to trust myself first and foremost.

The card on the right side of Letting Go is Honoring Your True Feelings. This is a repeat card that I've gotten quite a few times with this deck, although for some reason I don't think I've posted it. Maybe I did once, but I'd say this card came up for me more than half a dozen times when I was last using this deck a few weeks ago, and then again today. There's a card similar to this one about opening up and expressing yourself, being honest with yourself, and another about looking within, and I find that they are all symptoms of the same problem: lack of self-trust.

"Do not betray yourself, or rationalize that it's acceptable to deny your inner voice of truth."

The card talks about listening to your inner counselor and heeding the information that comes to you via your senses, your health, your emotions. Your GUT feelings. This definitely goes along with what I just wrote about listening to my higher self and my self in general. As if that was not specific enough about recommending my dialogue and journalling with my higher self, there's this sentence that comes in the description as well:

"If you're unclear about which emotions you're experiencing, write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal to gain clarity and understanding."

I really appreciate this message today and will do my best to continue to work on it.

Love,
MM

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