Friday, February 20, 2015
I'm thinking of doing a slightly longer hiatus--until spring (March 20/21) equinox time. I've been feeling restless like I want to work on something more concrete than blogging (I have been, but not enough for my liking) so I am going to put the blog to the side.
Sending you all a lovely next month,
Thursday, February 19, 2015
Whip + tower (19): trouble with authorities, fortress, military base
Tower + whip (11): gym, fitness center
When I saw option number one--military base, trouble with authorities, it didn't really ring a bell in my mind. But when I saw Tower+Whip...gym or fitness center, a light went off in my head. It reminded me of a conversation I had with my sister yesterday, when she was talking about a version of Qi Gong she had gone to, and how invigorating it was. It made me revisit the idea of taking a (very, very easy) exercise class somewhere. I have resistance to this because I don't like groups very much and I like exercise even less. So the combination is rather terrifying to me. But I admit that I realize exercise would only add to my vitality and help me to feel better overall.
So, I'll try to let this idea wend its way into my consciousness as a possibility.
Wednesday, February 18, 2015
First, some combo meanings:
From Faery Godmother Fortunes:
Heart/ Key- success in love, achieving a romantic goal
From Learn Lenormand:
Heart + key (33): significant love, certain love
Key + heart (24): significant love interest, express your affection
Looking over these meanings, and even pondering on it, I can't quite see how this will play out. Solutions for love/affection? The Key to my heart? Heart-based solutions? Haha...I don't know. It's kinda funny and maybe I'm trying too hard to figure it out.
Love to all,
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
|The Seer's face got washed out a bit in the light of the bathroom, but she's ok. :D|
I love my copy of the Tattered Nomad Oracle, gifted to me by the amazing Shaheen Miro. I love the aesthetic of his work, and this deck is no exception! In my duo for today, I received one *bonus* card, which is one of the extra cards Shaheen has included in his version of the Lenormand. This card is the Seer. As a tarot reader, I like this as an extra. It's relevant!
So, what does this card mean? According to the booklet is is about prophecy, insight, creative ideas...basically the intuitive, right-brained side of things. It reminds me a lot of the High Priestess in the traditional tarot. I think she's holding a giant crystal ball but I'm not sure. Either way, she's one groovy lady.
Unfortunately she's paired with Clouds, which is one of the 'problem' cards in the Lenormand. Haha! I'm mostly joking. It's really OK. In fact, one of the meanings I'm tossing around for this duo is 'using intuitive insight to work through problems'...so that could be a good thing. Clouds is still, in my view, far better than, say, Cross or Coffin, but maybe I'm being a little bit wimpy about it.
Honestly, when doing readings for yourself or others, it's best not to over analyze them, for good or ill. It's better to take the information in lightly, almost on a subconscious level, and not try to force a fit or flee from cards that seem like they might indicate trouble.
Looking up the super brief meaning of the Clouds card on LearnLenormand.com, I see this:
Keywords: CONFUSION, uncertainty, complications, bad weather, an older man.
OK. Well, this card is fairly self-explanatory so that doesn't tell me much. However, do I agree with the bad weather interpretation. I think sometimes a literal meaning does come up. There is a cold front arriving, with possible snow for 2 days straight. Not my favorite thing, but there you go!
I'll just let this one simmer on the back burner...
The Ace of Cups is an interesting card. Well, maybe it isn't, or maybe it really is. I don't know. Haha! Can you folks tell I'm tired?!!! My husband is on call and he was called several times last night. I had trouble getting to sleep and then, when I finally got to sleep, his work/on-call phone rang and woke me out of a dead sleep. Of course he woke too (poor guy, he gets up so early to go to work), and then the process began again when he got called a while later.
Maybe it was because I woke up several times but I had some really vivid dreams. Because they happened in the middle of the night I don't remember most of them or all of the details of the ones that stuck in my mind. The one that happened last was about being really late to pick up my daughter from school--like an hour or two late. In the dream I was in my car somewhere and I noted the time but I didn't realize I was already an hour late to pick her up. Then it was after 5pm and I had to get to the school and all of these obstacles came up.
The feeling of horror in the dream just increased as Murphy's Law asserted itself in scenario after scenario. I was heavily guilt-tripped by the school and other parents who yelled at me. Anyway, the feelings in the dream were very vivid, and I felt really crappy when I woke up, even though I knew it was just a dream. Do you know what I mean? When the feelings in your dream follow you after you wake up? Sometimes that happens with good dreams, too. Something happy is happening and when you wake up you're disappointed that you're not still asleep.
Anyway...I felt disoriented when I woke up, mostly because I'd slept really badly and my body was sore from falling on the stairs a couple days ago. Don't worry--I only fell a couple of steps, but I fell hard on my butt/hip and left side, and my shoulder has been popping. Thankfully I'm going to the chiropractor on Thursday for an appointment I've had planned for a month. Perhaps she can help me feel a bit less crappy. Hah!
So, the card...what does this make me think of? I guess that I've felt physically and emotionally drained and sore. Nothing life threatening as far as I know--just feel like my body and mind need some TLC. I'm working on tweaking my diet again, staying away from sugar, most dairy and caffeine. I feel like I'm experiencing adrenal fatigue again, or perhaps a bit of thyroid stuff, as I feel very tired and I'm having trouble sleeping at night. It could just be unacknowledged stress, as that can mess with things too.
I think that the essence of the Ace of Cups is the pure energy of feelings, or creativity, which often springs from emotions. I've been working on a few minor creative projects again recently--as I find that I feel better when I engage my creativity and allow it to flow.
Wishing you all a day of good feelings,
Monday, February 16, 2015
Now here's a concept that is pretty easy to understand, but hard to internalize at times. Well...for me, maybe. I think this is something I've been carrying around, consciously or unconsciously, my entire life. This idea of rescue. Now, my husband would describe this as low self-esteem. You don't believe in your own ability to manage stressful situations, so you default to wanting others to rescue you, whether it's through family, spouse, clients or through a knight-in-shining-armor type scenario.
Now, I think it's important to make the distinction here, though. It IS important and true that we're all interconnected, and none of us would survive without the help of countless others: farmers who grow the food we eat, people who work at the grocery stores, and the thousands of others whose coordinated efforts make an impact on our lives in some way. I often try to remember to internally thank those who have done things like, say, repair a road that I'm traveling on, or ship my food across the country in a big rig truck or train. There are so many hands, visible and invisible, to thank.
But this sense of needing rescue is another thing altogether. Not feeling able, not feeling good enough, not feeling confident when it is unwarranted and there's every reason to believe we can do well. Having a strong sense of self and one's own abilities is something I'm working on, and I hope to be better at before the end of my life!
Saturday, February 14, 2015
I wanted to pull a card and have it be helpful or relevant to how I'm feeling. I finished eating dinner with my family, which was relatively healthy and lower carb (spaghetti squash and a meat/tomato sauce), but then I had a molten chocolate lava cake, as there was just enough batter left for three half servings after my earlier celebration for my sister. Oy! I think I'm regretting that.
As I told my husband about 10 minutes before posting this, I just don't feel that great lately. I've been feeling sluggish and blah, and my eyes are tired and swollen. I just feel like my body is saying, 'ICK'...so when I got this card I had to agree. I feel like I need to get back to basics. I've been having too much sugar, dairy and caffeine. They seem to be my kryptonite. If I'm able to avoid sugar and carbs, then I seem to lean heavily into caffeine or dairy. Then I notice the resulting effects. For sugar, I feel sickly, gross in general, and moody (among other things). For dairy I get congested, leading to painful sinus headaches and other congestion-related issues, sometimes digestive issues as well. For caffeine I feel jumpy/anxious and it impacts my sleep. But I find it difficult to cut out all of the above. Dairy, sugar and caffeine. It's clear that I'm relying on them to fill some need.
In addition to that, in the past few weeks especially, we've been going out to eat too much. As one of my sisters pointed out, when you go out to eat the food is loaded with extra salt, sugar, and sometimes food additives. In addition, it isn't generally organic (except for one or two local/fair trade coffee shops), so that is bound to have a toxic impact as well.
The solution? To cut back considerably in all of the areas mentioned and emphasize simple, low carb, low sugar meals, and to stay rested and hydrated so I'm not tempted by caffeine or sugar. And dairy I just can't have very often.
So, by the time I post again, which I think will be next week, I hope to return to you all with a renewed sense of self-care, free from the crap!
Friday, February 13, 2015
Key + letter (27): required news, important message
Letter + key (33): important message, letter arrives
Personally, I have found the short and perhaps too pat combos over at LearnLenormand.com to be very helpful! Haha. I love too easy answers. They may not allow for complexity at first, but they are often surprising in their accuracy. I've mostly kept my readings with Lenormand to two or three cards. I think eventually I'll try larger spreads, but I like the immediacy of the readings that only use a few cards.
OK...so I decided to pull a THIRD card, a clarification. Why not? One of my fave things to do. As long as you don't take it too far and pull TEN clarification cards. Gets a little dicey around that time.
Some weird combos for you:
Key + lily (30): remain calm, significant older man
Letter + lily (30): old news, message from an older man
Lily + letter (27): old letters, man receives a message, provocative letter
Lily + key (33): important man, mentor, certainty
Hrmm. Very interesting. I know Lily can have a variety of meanings. Sometimes it means calm and peace, sometimes it means older folks or retirement, etc.
Anyway! I'll definitely try to update.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Whip + moon (32): obsession, sexual seduction
Moon + whip (11): touchy subject, arguments related to creativity (ex: temperamental artist), conflicted about success, foreplay
So, I know I'm posting early but here's a duo I pulled today. I thought I'd post it to surprise myself, since I might forget! Haha. This is an interesting combo. I posted the meanings from the Learn Lenormand website. I find them a bit too simplistic but it's a nice jumping off point. Whips suggest stress or motivation, but can also be sexy, as many people have pointed out. The Moon card, like its tarot companion, is a little mysterious, a little emotional. But the Lenormand version seems more cupsy in its energy, like the water element.
Even though my husband and I initially joked about the sexual meaning (which could still be true!) the other meaning about creativity and feeling conflicted about success seemed more appropriate for me. It's something I speak about often, and it has been coming up recently as I've been trying to be a bit more professionally detached when doing things like offering tarot readings for sale or working on creative commissions. I've lived so long in a space of giving almost everything away for free or cheap, that I definitely feel conflicted about charging for services, but I realized the only way through this discomfort is...well...through it!
Thursday, February 5, 2015
Wednesday, February 4, 2015
Monday, February 2, 2015
Here's a duo I pulled and I thought they were beautiful together, so here you go! The images in this deck are so inviting and evocative. These are concepts I was thinking about recently. How our connections with others have an almost karmic feel to them, in that we often learn our hardest lessons from them, but also receiving unexpected love and help from people who we may not initially expect to have help from.
I've had many friends and acquaintances in my life that pass through after a brief but very interesting kinship. I've spent far too much time over analyzing those connections, thinking that there was something more I could've done to hold them together or change them, but I realize that trying to force an issue or turn something into something it's not is a losing game.
Instead, I find it more appropriate to see people as gifts that you open. Some you keep forever, others you use for a while, enjoy them, then move on. I guess that comparison to re-gifting is a little trashy, but you get the idea, I hope! Holding on unnecessarily, trying too hard when it's unwarranted...those are the things that I want to let go of, not necessarily people, though that may happen in the process.
This is a beautifully illustrated, well-written oracle! I love it. I'm using the free trial for a week thing and so far I've been enjoying it. I got this card and I felt like it was really speaking to me. I feel like I've been in the throes of self-sabotage for a long time, only some of it acknowledged by me. When reading this card's description I felt catalyzed into action...to move away from a space of sabotage and into an energy of support and strength. And I also realized that I had already begun exploring this advice in recent days.
I thought of an example that I think works. I was recently commissioned by a friend of mine who is a realtor, to create valentine baskets for her staff with soap and body scrub in them. I was nervous because she told me to charge something and make it worth my while. So, even though I feel shaky around the concept of money and I didn't want to have to say, 'Pay me this!' I realized this was the perfect opportunity to break out of that mindset. So, armed with a new mindset I wrote down all of my expenses for the materials, then asked for a price that would assure I got a profit. Then she offered me $25 more than that and I accepted. And I felt decent about it!
I think this is definitely an improvement from last year, and from commissions that I've received in general. Last year I made some wedding favors for a friend who was having a carnival-themed wedding. I was super nervous about charging her for them, especially because she was stressing out so much about the wedding planning and was hemorrhaging money left and right for it. I even offered to make them for her for free as a gift, but when I realized how expensive the materials were I ended up charging her money for it, though I think I barely broke even on that one! The point is, had I entered that situation with more confidence and clarity, I could have carefully written down my expenses then had a bit of detachment when asking for a price that took into consideration the time, effort and money I put into making the products.
In previous years, I feel like I've not even tried to sell my wares to folks. I've been very half-assed about it. What I'm realizing is what this card states--that my own attitude about it has really caused the problems. There have been many times that I had a perfectly decent idea or plan, but didn't do it. Of course, that's a little different--that falls into choosing the wrong goals for the wrong reasons, but there's this piece that we're talking about here, which is not trusting in my ability to do things in the world and be compensated for it. At times it has been so pervasive that I can't see past it. But I'm beginning to see it a lot more clearly, and actually act against it. And all it takes is just staying in the moment with peace and clarity, and taking action from that space.
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Here's a duo I chose, with emphasis on February ideas and energies. I'm not quite sure what form this might take in my life, but there's a sense of not being so impatient and controlling. You know...human. Haha. Well, I hope everyone had a lovely January, or at least it wasn't too agonizing!
Lots of love,