Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Ace of Mirrors and the Flow of Feelings


The Ace of Cups is an interesting card. Well, maybe it isn't, or maybe it really is. I don't know. Haha! Can you folks tell I'm tired?!!! My husband is on call and he was called several times last night. I had trouble getting to sleep and then, when I finally got to sleep, his work/on-call phone rang and woke me out of a dead sleep. Of course he woke too (poor guy, he gets up so early to go to work), and then the process began again when he got called a while later.

Maybe it was because I woke up several times but I had some really vivid dreams. Because they happened in the middle of the night I don't remember most of them or all of the details of the ones that stuck in my mind. The one that happened last was about being really late to pick up my daughter from school--like an hour or two late. In the dream I was in my car somewhere and I noted the time but I didn't realize I was already an hour late to pick her up. Then it was after 5pm and I had to get to the school and all of these obstacles came up.

The feeling of horror in the dream just increased as Murphy's Law asserted itself in scenario after scenario. I was heavily guilt-tripped by the school and other parents who yelled at me. Anyway, the feelings in the dream were very vivid, and I felt really crappy when I woke up, even though I knew it was just a dream. Do you know what I mean? When the feelings in your dream follow you after you wake up? Sometimes that happens with good dreams, too. Something happy is happening and when you wake up you're disappointed that you're not still asleep.

Anyway...I felt disoriented when I woke up, mostly because I'd slept really badly and my body was sore from falling on the stairs a couple days ago. Don't worry--I only fell a couple of steps, but I fell hard on my butt/hip and left side, and my shoulder has been popping. Thankfully I'm going to the chiropractor on Thursday for an appointment I've had planned for a month. Perhaps she can help me feel a bit less crappy. Hah!

So, the card...what does this make me think of? I guess that I've felt physically and emotionally drained and sore. Nothing life threatening as far as I know--just feel like my body and mind need some TLC. I'm working on tweaking my diet again, staying away from sugar, most dairy and caffeine. I feel like I'm experiencing adrenal fatigue again, or perhaps a bit of thyroid stuff, as I feel very tired and I'm having trouble sleeping at night. It could just be unacknowledged stress, as that can mess with things too.

I think that the essence of the Ace of Cups is the pure energy of feelings, or creativity, which often springs from emotions. I've been working on a few minor creative projects again recently--as I find that I feel better when I engage my creativity and allow it to flow.

Wishing you all a day of good feelings,
MM

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